Top 10 Stupidest Law Suits
(Original post edited for the sake of brevity)
10 - An idiot sued Michael Jordan because he says Michael Jordan looks like him… .
9 -The Wendy’s Finger: Anna Ayala sued Wendy’s because she claimed that there was a finger in her chili. After a huge investigation, it turns out that she planted the finger in the chili… . .
8 - Kenneth Parker sued the state of Nevada because he ordered two jars of chunky peanut butter but instead got one jar of chunky and one jar of creamy. Did I mention that he ordered the peanut butter from the prison kitchen? … .
7 - The McDonald’s Coffee Case: Stella Liebeck sued McDonald’s because she spilled their coffee all over her lap and wound up in the hospital with 3rd degree burns. … .
6 - This one is sad because it involves the drowning of a Honda.:This drunk girl drove into Galveston Bay in Texas. Her friend got out alive but the drunk driver was too drunk to unfasten her seatbelt. So she died. So naturally, her parents sued Honda for manufacturing a seat belt that cannot be easily unbuckled by a drunk driver who is under water… . .
5 - A man sued Anheuser-Busch for $10,000. Why? False advertising. Dude claimed that unlike their beer commercials would suggest, drinking their brand of beer did not cause bikini girls to suddenly break into a volleyball game and invite him back to their hotel room. … .
4 - … . The Beatles formed a company called Apple Corps as a record label. They didn’t like Apple Computer using a similar name and also selling music. So they kept suing Apple Computer, trying to get money. … .
3- A man claimed his employer was discriminating against him. Okay. The jury awarded him over $300,000. Cool! What will he do with all that money? He’s going to spend it all on cigarette and lubricant! Because during the trial he held up a convenience store with a shotgun.Now he’s in prison for a decade.
2 - Prisoners have so much time on their hands, they think up a lot of great lawsuits. Robert Lee Brock decided to sue the man he blamed all his problems on. He sued him for $5 million dollars. He sued… himself… . .
1 - Now this one is my favorite: Dude sued a strip club because he claimed he suffered from whiplash! … .
Now we’re in my wheelhouse! Here’s a couple of my favorites, complete with links:
Man sues God for failing to guide and protect him.
Chancery judge annuls marriage because husband fails to overcome the presumption of impotence. To sum up:
In 1920, a New Jersey chancery judge was faced with a wife’s suit for marriage annulment on the ground of the husband’s alleged impotency during their five years together. The husband “vigorously protested his virility, but admitted the nonconsummation of the marriage.” The husband asserted he refrained from intercourse with his wife because he did not want to hurt her.
Interestingly, given the date, the judge thoughtfully considered whether the husband’s condition was psychological, especially since he had “submitted to an examination by one of his wife’s physicians, who testified that he was structurally a male, normal in the parts, and to all appearances capable of coition.”
The judge forged new legal ground in the U.S. by adopting from the English common law a rebuttable presumption of impotency after three years of marriage without sexual intercourse.
The decision here contains some great language (in a decision from the 1920s!):
In finding that the husband failed to overcome the presumption, the judge explained:
[T]he question comes to one of belief in his story of forbearance for five years, under most trying circumstances, simply because sexual intercourse was painful and distressing to her. I have misgivings. Such solicitude of a groom is noble, of a husband, heroic. Few have the fortitude to resist the temptations of the honeymoon. But human endurance has its limitations. When nature demands its due, youth is prodigal in the payment. Men are still cave men in the pleasures of the bed. The sex may be more temperate, but none the less passionate, and heedless of the penalty. They do not shirk the initiation nor shrink from the consequences. The husband’s plea does not inspire confidence. Common experience discredits it.
To paraphrase Forrest Gump: the law is like a box of chocolates; you never know what you’re going to get.
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